Fight Club
"Freedom is fought for and won, not granted."
My dad once shared with me his really good definition of freedom, and I really believe it. As parents, its very difficult to give a child his or her independence at any age. In my family, its not a matter of whether you are 18, or 21 or even 26. At this age, I still have a lot of things I cannot do (and will never be allowed to do) as long as I am single. Some which are reasonable, and the others, bordering on paranoia (of my parents).
I have tried everything possible to change this system. I've fought, whined, complained, questioned, but still get the same blank answers. Until I realized that my freedom is not solely based on what my parents are giving me (little teaspoonfulls at a time), but rather what I build for myself and work toward.
First step, I need to grow up. I need to remove my rose colored glasses and see the world as it is. I need to curb my needless urges to buy the latest this and buy that and start thinking about putting my earnings toward something that will yield more in the long run. I have to stop living excessively- such as ordering too much food in restaurants, buying 2 pairs of jeans when i only need one, or buying lunches everyday when there are days that I can just bring food to work.
Next step, I need to assess where I am and decide if this is where I want to be. Compared to a lot of people in my generation, I'm lucky that my dad has a business he needs help running, and I'm lucky that it is something that I actually find interesting and challenging and that I don't wake up each day dreading work. I can't do one thing and dream of doing one million things at the same time. I need to focus more and procrastinate less.
Lastly, I think I need to stop worrying about what people say about me and tell me to do and start believing in what I feel and think about myself. If certain people don't like the way I think, look and do things, that should be their problem and not mine. Life is too short for me to be living it according to how other people want it to be.
How funny. These are things that are trivial to a lot of people and certainly not new to me. But this is the first time I'm saying these to myself and actually putting them in writing. Yes yes yes, it is easier said than done. But as I say to my friends around me, it's just a matter of taking baby steps one day at a time. One fight at a time. One goal at a time.
My dad once shared with me his really good definition of freedom, and I really believe it. As parents, its very difficult to give a child his or her independence at any age. In my family, its not a matter of whether you are 18, or 21 or even 26. At this age, I still have a lot of things I cannot do (and will never be allowed to do) as long as I am single. Some which are reasonable, and the others, bordering on paranoia (of my parents).
I have tried everything possible to change this system. I've fought, whined, complained, questioned, but still get the same blank answers. Until I realized that my freedom is not solely based on what my parents are giving me (little teaspoonfulls at a time), but rather what I build for myself and work toward.
First step, I need to grow up. I need to remove my rose colored glasses and see the world as it is. I need to curb my needless urges to buy the latest this and buy that and start thinking about putting my earnings toward something that will yield more in the long run. I have to stop living excessively- such as ordering too much food in restaurants, buying 2 pairs of jeans when i only need one, or buying lunches everyday when there are days that I can just bring food to work.
Next step, I need to assess where I am and decide if this is where I want to be. Compared to a lot of people in my generation, I'm lucky that my dad has a business he needs help running, and I'm lucky that it is something that I actually find interesting and challenging and that I don't wake up each day dreading work. I can't do one thing and dream of doing one million things at the same time. I need to focus more and procrastinate less.
Lastly, I think I need to stop worrying about what people say about me and tell me to do and start believing in what I feel and think about myself. If certain people don't like the way I think, look and do things, that should be their problem and not mine. Life is too short for me to be living it according to how other people want it to be.
How funny. These are things that are trivial to a lot of people and certainly not new to me. But this is the first time I'm saying these to myself and actually putting them in writing. Yes yes yes, it is easier said than done. But as I say to my friends around me, it's just a matter of taking baby steps one day at a time. One fight at a time. One goal at a time.
posted by kath | 3:58 PM
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