The Art of Goodbyes

I think I learned something valuable today.

Taking stock of my life so far, I realized that most of it was lived in an altogether sheltered life. I never had to want for many things. Materially, things were just always there for me. It was not that difficult for me to gain friends and go through the stages of life. I never had angst and depression plague my life, nor did I have extreme fits of rebellion of any kind. I never was one who threw tantrums, and although my very patient and sane boyfriend can attest to the fact that I do have some psychotic moments (full blame on PMS), I was normal, and straight.

One thing I could not ever master though, was the art of saying goodbye, albeit temporarily. I call saying goodbye an art because there are thousands of ways of saying goodbye. I don't think that there is one exact manner in which a person or two persons say goodbye to each other. Therefore, if there are 8 billion people in this world, imagine 8 billion ways of saying goodbye. My parents taught me many things in my life, but saying goodbye was not one of them. I always either rushed through my goodbyes (as not to cry), or lingered over it too long (thus causing my tear ducts to overflow). Nonetheless, it was goodbye. For now, for a day, for a week, or even for ever.

My boyfriend left today for 25 days. Of course we have been apart far longer than that (once or twice). But what I realized was that I never could get over the first day quite so smoothly. I have teary moments, scary moments, poignant and happy moments and even prayerful moments. After today, they may lessen and fade as day 24 and 25 creep by, to be replaced instead by anticipation and excitement.

So what did I learn today? Hmm... I'm learning not to be pakipot in admitting that I do and will miss my beloved a lot. (and I'm not talking about Oreo!)

Have fun though, for both of us!